Turning a Straight Girl, Gay

I bet you feel real special; and want a round of applause for being a lesbian who got with a “straight girl” & assumed that she liked it so much that she now became a lesbian — I guess you probably assumed you were irresistible & she couldn’t get enough of you, in turn making her a lesbian or perhaps bisexual. Notice the small ounce of [[sarcasm]] because it seems lesbians tend to “get off” on hooking up with a straight girl to prove a point about either ‘how good in bed they are’ or ‘how much better they are compared to men in the bedroom’ — & my thought on this whole thing:

GROW UP. 

I am not against the rush you get from sleeping with someone who wouldn’t otherwise consider you their type, but I do find it highly annoying that our community gets kicks from sleeping with hetero women to prove points or to get an ego boost — like if that is what gives you confidence, then you have a lot more to work on. I don’t think having sexual relations with a hetero women is bad, I don’t care about that aspect at all; I just get bothered that we make it into this game that we later brag about.. [[not all lesbians are this way]]but a vast majority that I have known or spoken with in FB groups have this complex. 

We all have our vices, but using someone else to get our kicks — or kudos points is quite lowly [[ speaking from opinion]] especially when it comes to sex, because I believe we wouldn’t want some dude we had sex with to say he “turned us straight” because of one sexual encounter — like experimenting with our sexuality is a thing & I think people should do it; if its upon their hearts to do. 

The thing with sleeping with straight women is you don’t know what the end result will be, and you can’t assume because she liked having sex with you, that she is a lesbian & wants to date you — because it’s a fact that some women like having sexual relations with other women but wouldn’t date one/ or have a relationship with one. Also, it could be she was confused and you helped to give her perspective; maybe she wanted to experiment to see what she liked, perhaps she just wanted to try something new for the first time with a female or she might have noticed she was attracted to other women and didn’t quite understand it fully and wanted to follow that path to learn more about herself. Idk. Doesn’t really matter, because the point is, we can’t assume that because we slept with a straight girl, that she is automatically going to be a lesbian or want to date you afterwards. My first girlfriend at 18 had never been with women & neither had I, but we both admitted that we were attracted to women & each other and wanted to go through with our feelings — we dated & eventually had sex but I don’t believe it ‘made her gay’; I think that was of her to want to date women already and she wanted to learn more about that side of her & so did I. During our relationship her feelings would flip flop between being with men and wanting to be with me, doesn’t mean she was bisexual either, because it could have been she enjoyed our sexual encounters but maybe dating me [another female]  was difficult for her internally & she couldn’t organize her thoughts or feelings at the time. We dated 2 years and broke up, but later I found out she finally came out as a lesbian — [[ although I think now she is with a man]] so I don’t know & don’t care but the point is, it took us time to sort out our feelings & sort out who we are & what we want & it will be the same for any other women within or outside our community. 

I get it ladies, we yearn for a challenge every once in a while & perhaps we do ‘turn someone lesbian’ That’s A – OK, but think of it as if you were dating this person, would you want your relationship to be based on the fact you changed her sexuality or does it have more meaning than that; I’d like to think the latter. I always have believed that we don’t change people; people change because they want to or because they always had it in them — and maybe a significant event or circumstance made it possible for them to make that choice. I don’t target straight women, but I do believe that if I had the chance to have sexual relations with a straight women — I wouldn’t make it priority because I have to consider my own feelings and protect myself from possible hurt if it didn’t workout in my favor & I ended up liking her. Doesn’t mean the possibility isn’t there; just means it will depend on where I am in life & what my expectations are of this person. I do believe that being a lesbian isn’t a choice — I believe that my sexuality is how I felt about the same sex, is what felt comfortable to me, it’s a part of who I am because I was born this way & I think women who ‘turn gay’ have felt the same way at some point but maybe didn’t act on it early on or wasn’t comfortable with their feelings. As a community ladies, let’s really think about what’s more important — is it the fact we can have sex with a hetero female in hopes it makes her gay so we can get kudos OR is it the fact that someone felt completely comfortable with you enough to expose who they really are & might have been confused or scared of up until that point. I’ll let you decide. 

You can keep your bragging points for sleeping with a straight girl, I much rather save my points for something more special. —- 

Shay-lon 

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