What Does Being a Lesbian Mean?

Maybe perhaps you are someone who is new to the LGBT community or maybe you have a friend or family member who is gay and you don’t understand it. It all seems very new to you, just like it seemed new to me too. 

Explaining my sexuality to all of you won’t be easy because there is no long explanation or significant why and how, it is just that I am attracted to females. However, when I came out, I was bi-sexual and even though that is more so excepted, it is also more so looked down upon. There is no safe place or time out for me, i just have this feeling that when you ask me what being a lesbian means, you will expect something elegant and rather funny but instead, I will look you in the eye and say “I am sexually attracted to women, but men can be pleasing to look at” . 

 

Being a lesbian is different for everyone, because for some reason there are these rules people like to follow that make them feel superior in our community, but that is a conversation for another day. You want to know if I have ever been with a man to make a sound decision on my sexuality , and I will tell you yes, I have (not in intercourse). but that doesn’t matter because I don’t think that would change my mind anyways. Yet, I have kissed, hugged, made out and touched a man, many of them to be honest and nothing made me more uncomfortable than when they wanted more than I was willing to give, they were ready for 3rd base and I was hanging on first sometimes dreading 2nd base – it isn’t their fault because they didn’t know I was fighting with inner demons that didn’t allow me to feel comfortable being who I was and so pretending to be sexually attracted to men was the only route – even if it meant I had to succumb to certain duties to prove I wasn’t lesbian at the time.  Do you think being a lesbian means I am attracted to all women? Hahahaha well I will have you know, this is false. For me. I have standards, and high standards at that, I don’t fuck everything that walks and i don’t gawk at everything with boobs and an ass. I will tell you my type in a future blog post, for now you should know that NOT all lesbians are trying to get with your wife or sister, some of us have this thing called “class” where being a lesbian, we are attracted to the same-sex but we don’t go after a women just because she is a women. 

 

Call me odd, because I am supposed to tell you all women are beautiful , but that doesn’t mean all women are my type and that doesn’t mean because I am a lesbian I have no standards. Do you think that by me being a lesbian, I have this sign on my head that says “I eat vagina”  Well funny that you should think that, because NOT all lesbians do. So here we are discussing all the things that could possibly make me a lesbian, and some of you are reading my post in shock and some of you are in denial but hey, either way not all lesbians are the same and so what does being a lesbian mean to ME?

 
 
  • Accepting the fact that you find women attractive. 

When you have fully accepted this about yourself as woman, you have acknowledged your sexuality. But this rule is universal because when you have any attraction to someone of any sex, you have to be comfortable with it and accept it for what it is – to me that is the meaning behind any sexuality. 

 

If you haven’t accepted this part of your life yet, if you haven’t acknowledged your sexuality (regardless of your sexuality), you soon will and when you do, it will change your life; it will make you feel more confident in what you look for in a person (personality, looks, traits, etc) and it will make you feel more confident in speaking about it to others who may ask you about it. 

Thanks for reading, I hope this was a good post, for I am new to this whole LGBT blog and want to make sure it comes across real and honest. Leave comments, follow, like and share. 

 

Shay-lon 

 

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